500 thousand people in the United States choose non-standard marriages

Polyamory is a special family organization, which includes not two, but three or more people. And in the United States today, more than half a million people have chosen this form of relationship. In Russia, such unions also exist, but they are not talked about much. What are these unions, how do they differ from the classical family?

The modern institution of marriage is changing dramatically. People began to get divorced more often, it became normal to live without relationships at all. And then polyamorous people appeared, people who love not just one, but several partners at once.

Polyamory in real life

A person does not always find in one partner everything that he needs. Sometimes there are not enough qualities, skills and interests. And all this can be found in two or three people. And why not love them all?

A polyamorous family is a community with agreed rules. Most often it includes people who love each other. All contacts are not hidden, and any problems are discussed.

Partners can lead a common sex life, practice group sex. Only sex can occur between certain members of a group, and never between certain individuals.

It’s easier to explain with a specific family. The Seattle family has 5 members. It all started with Theresa and Scott. They lived together for 12 years. In the 5th year of their life together, Larry joined them, the union expanded and began to include three people. And just a couple of years ago, Matt appeared. He did not live with this family, although he met regularly with Theresa. Later, the wife of Metta, who fell in love with Larry, also joined the union.

Only at the beginning does it seem complicated, but in reality it is a very strong community with warm relations. Moreover, each member of the family has the right to start novels also “on the side”.

How does sex have polyamorous

If you look at the described example, Teresa has sex with all the men from the union. But he does it only separately, I do not practice group sex. Family members do not have bans on general lovemaking, they just decided that it was more convenient for them.

All sexual contacts are spontaneous, there is no definite agreement. But the main condition is absolute honesty. All family members know about all the connections.

Sex is not the foundation of this union. Such a marriage, although it is not legalized, is built on love, respect and interest. People decide to be near not because of physical desire, but because of feelings.

What to do with jealousy?

Polyamor are also jealous. They just learn to get around it. If someone feels a lack of attention, he claims it. All negative experiences are discussed at the initial stage, so as not to bring to conflict.

Any member of the family knows that if he lacks something, and if the family cannot give it, it is worthwhile to find it in other people. Therefore, dating, flirting and romance are welcome.

Parenting

Children in plyamorous relationships are often born. They consider all members of the community to be parents, although according to the documents they are only two.

Social services still negatively assess such unions, so such families often hide their relationships. In society, they are represented by relatives living under the same roof so as not to cause negativity.

In Russia, such families also exist, but they also do not advertise their relationship. But there are no statistics saying how many of them there are. But in the United States, the number of people in polyamorous marriages in 2019 has already exceeded 500 thousand people.

Fashion for polyamorous relationships began in the USA in the 70s. Although much time has passed, such unions are still not accepted by society. In Russia, such relations are condemned by society, are considered “perverted.” But youth interest in such relationships is growing every year.

Do you know pliamore unions? Is there a similar relationship in your environment?

event_note April 30, 2020

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