6 ways to save a marriage that no longer has sex
If the couple lost an intimate relationship, then it’s time to change something. You do not need to get divorced right away, you should try other methods that will return sex. They are available to everyone, but require effort. 6 ways to save a marriage are approved by psychologists, they have already saved many unions.
1. Remember yourself
In a pair, a person can “lose” himself. He partially loses time, favorite activities, and individual characteristics. And this is normal in the first periods of a relationship. But in the future, it is worthwhile to regain forgotten hobbies. From the created “we” it is worth gradually returning to the “I”. It is recommended to remember your goals, your plans.
Removal from each other, creation of a distance will allow to form more interests. The couple will have something to talk about. The union of two personalities with their own life is more stable than the one in which people are always together and without individual hobbies. The distance will allow you to stop being nervous. Switching to one’s own needs rather than the needs of the family will help to look differently at the union.
2. Talk about the problem
Not only one person should survive because of her, but both partners. Therefore, it is necessary to discuss what is happening, to understand what does not suit both. Together, it’s worth coming up with a solution. For example, allocate time for sex 2-3 times a week.
So that the partner is not offended, the dialogue is built not in the form of a claim , but through “I feel”, “I am disturbed”. And you need to be prepared that there are things that do not suit your loved one. And they also need to be able to listen and correct.
3. Time together
Take time every day to chat . 10-30 minutes without strangers, without telephones or TV. Let it be a time of communication that cannot be missed. Put the children to bed, send the parents to your room and just have tea together. Communication will allow you to get close or understand that you no longer need each other. It shows if the pair has something else in common or the union has already outlived itself.
In order to initiate sex, invent something new. Buy sex toys, choose role-playing costumes or BDSM accessories together . Take time to discuss fantasies and further translate them. Sometimes appetite comes with eating, so it’s important to start making love to make it interesting. If you are looking for solutions to laziness, buy a set of useful accessories for a couple or a game with tasks . And follow the manufacturer’s instructions. Overcome inertia, after 3-5 experiments it will become interesting without outside help.
5. Create a space of love
Remember what pleased both of you at the beginning of the relationship. Repeat the first dates, visit memorable places. Look for inspiration to continue living together in what unites you. Sometimes it is appropriate to go on vacation in order to temporarily distance oneself from everyday problems. And this is worth doing if the likelihood of a break increases. This is a good way to save a relationship.
6. Delight your loved one
Do not choose the position “you owe me / must”, do not demand initiative from a partner , show it yourself. Think of reasons for privacy, try ways of seduction. Learn the partner’s love language, and try to show him what else is of interest. Relationships are work that takes time, desire. And it’s much easier to break up than to build something long-term. If everyone tries to improve the world of another, passion will return. And maybe she will not be as bright as at the beginning, but sex will happen and he will be desired.